Is “Mommy Brain” Actually Real? New Moms Need Real Answers

A Mom Holding her Hand to her head - "Mommy Brain"

You woke up today with a lot of things to do. You have housework, a doctor’s appointment, and a million other things. 

Then this happened:

You made coffee but you can’t remember where you left it. 

It’s in the microwave.

Your husband called and you told him you lost your phone. 

You’re talking on it.  

Your baby has a doctor’s appointment, but you can’t find your keys. 

Oh, wait, they’re in the refrigerator. 

New Moms Wonder: Why Is This Happening? 

Lately, does it feel like your brain is buffering

Are you feeling like a computer with a low-quality Wi-Fi connection? The rainbow wheel is spinning, except it’s not a wheel–it’s your brain. 

Now, you may be thinking a “buffering” brain isn’t normal. However, for many postpartum and pregnant women, it is. 

Moms everywhere seem to share this “mommy brain” phenomenon. Is it actually something happening, or is it, as they say, “all in your head?”

“Mommy brain” is a non-medical term to describe a pregnant and postpartum woman’s sudden forgetfulness. You might have “mommy brain” or “pregnancy brain,” as a new mom, pregnant woman, or a mother of multiple kids. 

Here are the common “mommy brain” signs: 

  • Brain fog
  • Forgetfulness 
  • Difficulty recalling words 
  • Struggles with multi-tasking 

If you are experiencing any of these, you are in good company. Close to 80% of pregnant or postpartum women report increased memory loss. If you are experiencing this, don’t worry– you are in the majority.

Believe it or not, even neuroscientists have evidence to support these symptoms. 

The Science Behind “Mommy Brain” 

The “mommy brain” idea has limited studies, however, findings from current studies are astonishing. During pregnancy, the female body undergoes many hormonal changes. Your body is preparing to make room for a growing baby and also for motherhood. 

Then, after giving birth, your body goes through a whole other host of changes. Both pregnant women and postpartum moms are often amazed (and a little terrified) by the changes happening in their bodies. 

The Washington Post recently released an article about “mommy brain.” It explained that pregnancy causes “an extraordinary period of reorganization” in the brain. This is called neuroplasticity

Neuroplasticity is your brain’s reorganization process. Your brain’s structure and function change in response to intrinsic and environmental changes. Having a baby is an extreme “environmental challenge,” changing the course of your life. Something so life-changing is going to have an impact on how your brain operates. 

In fact, your brain structure physically changes. A recent study detected a gray matter increase in the brain’s cortical and subcortical regions. This means, gray matter is increasing in the cortex of the brain, mainly where your decision-making takes place. It is also increasing the subcortex, where many primitive functions live, such as emotions. 

Doesn’t it make sense that your brain would be “buffering?” As your brain adapts to the intense changes in your body, give yourself some grace. 

A Mom’s Memory and “The Pruning Process”

Now, increasing gray matter sounds like a good thing! I will say, it is. However, while your brain is increasing gray matter in certain areas, it is decreasing gray matter in others. 

Here enters your sudden forgetfulness. As your brain reinvents itself, it’s normal to be forgetful. Actually, experts have a lot to say on the matter. 

Dr. Lisa Galea, a neuroscientist who studies neuroplasticity in the female brain, explains this process. She discusses how your brain is constantly learning. In the process of learning, a “pruning process” takes place. She goes on to say, our brains need to rewire to prepare for motherhood. In becoming a mom, you become less selfish and more in tune with your baby’s needs. Meaning, that certain areas of your brain need to grow to fulfill this need. 

Much like gardening, this pruning process takes time. A gardener will take time to prune a bush, flowers, or trees. This allows them to grow better under their current circumstances. Your brain does the same thing. Especially for new moms, this change can be shocking.

Does “Mom Brain” Ever Go Away?

In short, yes.

The answer is not black and white. Every woman’s body is different and will react to changes differently. However, in a recent study, they found that gray matter reduction usually continues to happen for 2 years after giving birth. Meaning, it is possible to experience “mommy brain” for more than just a few weeks or months.

Other factors paired with gray matter reduction may cause forgetfulness as well. For example, sleep deprivation. Many new moms experience this in their baby’s first months. Getting up every few hours for feedings and changes will impact how your brain functions.

Motherhood stress can also lead to “mommy brain” symptoms as well. In general, mothers need to juggle many tasks and wear a lot of hats. Your long to-do list could be putting your brain into “buffering” mode too.

Long story short, your brain is undergoing a wide variety of changes. It takes time to adapt to motherhood. Give yourself grace and time.

Is It “All In My Head?” 

Allow me to say, it’s not. 

However, is it happening in your head?

Yes. 

Don’t allow the toxic narrative surrounding “mommy brain” to dismiss your very real experience. Major things are happening as your brain alters its chemistry. 

Instead, educate yourself and be aware of the changes happening. You know yourself better than anyone. Listen to your body and trust it. 

Reach Out For Support

Becoming a mom is an amazing, yet terrifying experience. You are not in this alone. It’s important to find people in your life to turn to.

Motherhood is a journey with twists and turns, but one that many have traveled. Remember, you can always reach out to friends and family, your doula, or your care provider for support. 

You’ve got this!

Also check out: Understanding the Hormones of Early Pregnancy

About Christie Collbran

Christie believes in helping women recognize their own inner wisdom, strength and power. Having served as President of the Tampa Bay Birth Network for six years and with ten years serving families as a birth doula, she has a reputation for leadership, dedication and compassion. A childbirth educator, certified lactation counselor as well as a certified doula, she makes a point of ensuring mothers and their partners understand all their birthing options and what to expect on their journey.> keep reading